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Staying Sane While Wall Street Crashes

by David Leonhardt

Everybody is riding the Wall Street Roller coaster. Even if you
are not invested, the headlines scream out one word: PANIC!

It's hard not to join in the panicking. The Panic Crowd seems to
be having all the fun these days. But they don't have all the
happiness. You see, it's true what your mother told you: money
doesn't buy happiness, at least not for most people. But the
lack of money does buy pure misery.

Did you ever wonder why so many office towers have fusion-sealed,
micron-proof windows to keep office workers safe from any
semblance of fresh air? It has to do with the stock market.
During The Great Depression, just too many brokers were jumping
out of windows. This enraged a nation of vengeful investors, who
demanded to kill their brokers personally. So henceforth all
windows were sealed.

(The good news is that by the time the windows were sealed, The
Great Depression had ended, so there have been very few reported
cases of enraged investors killing their brokers. However, there
have been several incidents of "office air suffocation syndrome"
-- but that's another issue for another column.)

Oh no! Not another Top Ten list!

Here are The Happy Guy's Top Ten Tips for Staying Sane While Wall
Street Crashes Around You:

1. Don't panic. Enough people are doing that already; you're
needed elsewhere.

2. Don't join the Panic Crowd. They are NOT having more fun,
they just act that way to attract new members fold. Misery loves
company.

3. Take inventory. Do you have the basic necessities? If so,
you are OK. When they come to take away your television remote
control, then panic.

4. Smile at your neighbor. A smile lifts everybody's spirits,
but most of all your own.

5. Remember the Great Depression. It sucked, but people
survived. It's amazing how many non-essentials we take for
granted. Rent a movie about the 1930s, sit back, and laugh about
how much better our depression is going to be.

6. Learn a new skill. In hard times, it pays to be very, very
employable. And you may even be lucky enough to have two jobs.
Oh, wait. That's our problem now.

7. Start saving now. Then when the bottom falls out, at least
you'll have something to live on for three-and-a-half weeks.

8. Start spending now. It's folks like you, saving all your
money instead of spending it, that are killing the economy.

9. Stop listening to people telling you to save or to spend. In
fact, stop listening to news about the markets. It's just too
depressing.

10. Ignore top ten lists. They are way too gimmicky and seldom
give any truly useful information (except for this one, of
course!)

There you have it. The Happy Guy's Top Ten Tips for Staying Sane
While Wall Street Crashes Around You. All the advice your mother
didn't tell you about financial markets, and more importantly,
about keeping happy while others suffer. The bottom line is
don't panic, don't invest all your emotions where your money is
invested, and focus on what really matters.

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